Leverage Long and Propser

I just saw a job description that splattered words like leverage, mission-driven and utilize all over the page and it made me want to puke on my keyboard.

It makes me want to ask the writer, “When you are out having a meal with your friends, do you ask your best pal to leverage her proximity to the condiments and procure the salt for you? Was your last trip to the bathroom mission-driven? If you can use plain English when speaking with your friends, why can’t you use plain English when speaking with business colleagues?”

I have worked at companies where employees spoke in this meaningless jargon all day long and it made me want to shoot myself in the head rather than work there one day longer. It was like spending eight hours a day, five days a week at a Star Trek convention where everyone is speaking Klingon – a made-up language that is completely useless and means nothing to anyone other than insiders.

I just want to work with at a place where people say what they mean in plain English. Is that too much to ask?

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